Shalom Life | March 29, 2015

The “Jewish” Avengers Lands in Theatres

Jews Play a big Role in Saving the Universe

By: Daniel Horowitz

Published: May 4th, 2012 in Culture » Film » News

The “Jewish” Avengers Lands in Theatres

We must be approaching summer, as the first big, and one of the most highly anticipated summer blockbusters has finally flown into theatres and, yes, faithful Shalom Life readers, there is a decidedly Jewish flavor to the flick.

For those of you unaware of the storyline, Nick Fury, played by the incomparable and not Jewish Samuel L. Jackson is the director of S.H.I.E.L.D, an international peace keeping agency. The agency is a who's who of Marvel Super Heroes, all created by Jewish comic book writers Stan Lee, Jack Kirby and Joe Simon, with Iron Man and his alter ego, Tony Stark, played by Member of the Tribe, Robert Downey Junior; The Incredible Hulk, Thor, Captain America, Hawkeye and Black Widow, played by the unlikeliest and probably sexiest of Jewesses, Scarlett Johansson.

When global security is threatened by Loki and his cohorts, Nick Fury and his team will need all their powers to save the world from disaster.

To enable herself to literally squirm her way into her Black Widow costume, Johansson, like Jewish women everywhere who are preparing for a bat mitzvah, wedding or funeral, struggles into a pair of Super Hero Spanx before every costume fitting where, outside her dressing room, passerbys have heard her scream, “Oy vey, I can’t get into these @$@%@ things and I’m starting to schvitz!”

Meanwhile, Downey Junior, who has reportedly slept in every dressing room and trailer other than his own, has already cost the production millions in overtime, insisting that he, the Hulk, and Hawkeye lay tefillan every morning before donning their costumes.

Gwyneth Paltrow, who comes from a long lineage of rabbis, is Iron Man’s faithful servant, Pepper Potts, who ensures that her boss’s every whim is taken care of before he takes off on another mission, including picking up a fresh chala for Shabbos, and making sure he doesn't leave the house without first eating a fresh bagel with shmeer.

Due to the overwhelming Jewishness of the cast, producers originally were looking into other names for the film. Some titles that were decided against include: “Hebrew Heroes”, “The Whiners”, and “Hooray for the Hebes!”

Due to a last minute casting decision, actor Mel Gibson was dropped from his role as Iron Man’s Rabbi.

Op-Ed: Lena Dunham’s 'Dog or Jewish Boyfriend' Piece is Thoughtless and Offensive Op-Ed: Lena Dunham’s 'Dog or Jewish Boyfriend' Piece is Thoughtless and Offensive TrendingJames Deen to Play Himself on Showtime's 'Happyish' James Deen to Play Himself on Showtime's 'Happyish' TrendingBen Stiller's Ten Best Film Roles Ben Stiller's Ten Best Film Roles Trending
 

Wales Defeats Israel 3 - 0 in EURO 2016 Qualifiers

March 28, 2015 | By Daniel Koren
Wales Defeats Israel 3 - 0 in EURO 2016 Qualifiers

The blue-and-whites experienced their first loss of the EURO 2016 qualifying matches at home in Haifa

Read More

Op-Ed: Obama, not Netanyahu, is Killing the Two-State Solution

March 27, 2015 | By Ben Cohen, JNS.org
Op-Ed: Obama, not Netanyahu, is Killing the Two-State Solution

The U.S. President has never really empathized with the emotions that govern Israeli perceptions of the wider region

Read More

Op-Ed: Lena Dunham’s 'Dog or Jewish Boyfriend' Piece is Thoughtless and Offensive

March 27, 2015 | By Caitlin Marceau
Op-Ed: Lena Dunham’s 'Dog or Jewish Boyfriend' Piece is Thoughtless and Offensive

In her latest literary endeavour, 'Girls' star Dunham tries to come across as funny by comparing her boyfriend to a dog; she doesn't

Read More

James Deen to Play Himself on Showtime's 'Happyish'

March 27, 2015 | By Daniel Koren
James Deen to Play Himself on Showtime's 'Happyish'

The prolific Jewish porn star will appear in a cameo on the new show out on April 26th

Read More

Woman Exposes Herself To Minors At Arizona Bar Mitzvah

March 27, 2015 | By Caitlin Marceau
Woman Exposes Herself To Minors At Arizona Bar Mitzvah

Lindsey Radomski is being charged by police after allegedly exposing herself to, and performing oral sex on, minors at a Bar Mitzvah this past Saturday

Read More

Association Assisting Holocaust Survivors Needs Your Help To Make Their Passover Seder Possible

March 27, 2015 | By Caitlin Marceau
Association Assisting Holocaust Survivors Needs Your Help To Make Their Passover Seder Possible

The group, which holds an annual Passover Seder, is in danger of having to cancel their event due to the lack of funds needed to help the 450+ survivors who, without them, will be celebrating alone this year

Read More

Shortly Before they Died in Brooklyn Fire, the Sassoon Children Recorded This Emotional Song [VIDEO]

March 27, 2015 | By Tali Farkash & Liron Nagler-Cohen
Shortly Before they Died in Brooklyn Fire, the Sassoon Children Recorded This Emotional Song [VIDEO]

Song is their own version of Hasidic singer Yaakov Shwekey's hit "Cry No More"

Read More

Facebook Integrates Israeli App into Messenger

March 26, 2015 | By NoCamels Team
Facebook Integrates Israeli App into Messenger

Social media giant incorporates Magisto, an app that turns photos and videos into a short animated film

Read More

More Headlines