We Could Be in The Presence of an Authentic Jewish Princess
With apologies to Frank Zappa, princess Kate could be a Jewess
We’ve all heard the jokes about Jewish American Princesses (JAPS).
Hell, the late, great Frank Zappa even immortalized the JAP in 1979, when he wrote and performed a song called Jewish Princess in his album Sheik Yerbouti, making fun of the stereotype.
But, the truth is, we actually may be in the presence of real Jewish royalty, in fact, an actual Jewish Princess, in the person of Kate Middleton.
Ever since the April 29, 2011 wedding of Prince William, Duke of Cambridge, and Catherine (Kate) Middleton at Westminster Abbey in London, the rumours began to spread (at least among us Members of the Tribe) that the Princess Kate’s mom, Carole Goldsmith, was packing some Jewish genes which (GASP!) of course, according to Halacha, would make Kate a JBP (Jewish British Princess).
Could it be? Could Kate be the first future Jewish Queen to take to the throne?
As they say in England, “not bloody likely, mate!” It seems that at least the last five generations of Goldsmith’s family were married in churches, with no sign of a synagogue anywhere in sight.
Still, there are those who, citing the Spanish Inquisition where many Jews were forced to hide their true identities, are undeterred from their theory that Kate is Jewish, as was her mother. There is even an Orthodox Sephardic Rabbi in Israel who insists that Kate's parents were both Jewish.
And, speaking of Jewish Princesses, another source even claims that the late Princess Diana's mother, Frances Shand Kydd, was Jewish – and was born as Frances Ruth Burke Roche, one of the Rothschilds.
So, let’s recap. It’s still entirely possible that Kate, the future Queen of England, is Jewish, while England’s future king, Prince William, was born to what halacha would consider a Jewish mother in Lady Di, making him a future Jewish king!
Hmmm. And, now, with Kate expecting…would that make Prince Charles a zaidie?
I can’t even follow this anymore. Where’s Frank Zappa when we really need him?