Shalom Life | May 28, 2015

IOC to Hold Special Moment of Silence at Closing Ceremonies

International Olympic Committee decides to commemorate important events

By: Daniel Horowitz

Published: August 3rd, 2012 in News » World

IOC to Hold Special Moment of Silence at Closing Ceremonies

In what can only be described as an unexpected announcement, Shalom Life has learned that Jacques Rogge, the president of the International Olympic Committee (IOC), has agreed to hold a special commemorative ceremony that will include a moment of silence at the conclusion of the London Olympics, on Sunday, August 12th.

However, what is also unexpected is that the ceremony will not, as hoped by many, commemorate the “Munich 11” - the members of the 1972 Israeli Olympic team murdered during the Munich Olympics - but rather other issues of importance to Rogge himself.

According to preliminary reports acquired by Shalom Life, the ceremony will open with a video montage featuring the best moments of Jennifer Lopez’s time on American Idol, followed by a moment of silence for the singer, who has, much to the dismay of Rogge, announced that she will not be returning to the show next season.

“Unless there’s something that is absolutely urgent, perhaps a White Supremacist Meeting, I make sure that I’m home, in front of my television whenever American Idol is on,” said Rogge in a statement issued last week. “I don’t know what I’m going to do without J. Lo; to me she was the heart and soul of the show. And Stephen Tyler is leaving, too? There’s something terribly wrong with this world if nobody is going to commemorate this tremendous loss, and I feel that the Olympics’ closing ceremonies is the perfect venue in which to hold such a commemoration event.”

The event, which will also feature a song and dance extravaganza with all members of the respective Olympic teams except for the Israeli team and any Jewish competitors, is expected to also see a moment of silence held for the new Sheenless version of Two-and-a-Half Men, another Rogge staple.

“It’s too bad that Charlie had to leave because of the abuse he surely suffered at the hands of the show’s Zionist executive producer,” said Rogge. “I really never got into Ashton Kutcher’s character. I don’t believe that Charlie Sheen’s departure from the show was ever treated properly, and I feel that a ceremony to remember the wonderful and somewhat enigmatic character that was Charlie Harper deserves recognition and a moment of silence at the Olympics, which I feel, is the most appropriate venue for that commemoration.”

Olympic organizers, at the behest of Rogge and the rest of the IOC, are also considering the inclusion of a special dance to be performed by all African nations competing in London, that would serve as a special commemoration for, and salute to, Kofi Annan, the UN-Arab League special envoy for Syria, who announced this week that he is stepping down at the end of the month.

Asked if there will be a moment of silence held for Annan’s departure from the UN, Rogge relied, “Of course, why wouldn’t there be? I think the Olympics is the perfect venue to hold a moment of silence for all important moments that have had an ongoing affect on the people of the world.”

The above story is fiction. Well, except for the part that the IOC will not commemorate the Munich 11. That, sadly, is the truth. Shame on you IOC.

Why is This Blatantly anti-Semitic Course Still Being Offered at UC Riverside? Why is This Blatantly anti-Semitic Course Still Being Offered at UC Riverside? TrendingThis Toddler Threw a Fit in Front of President Obama During a Passover Seder This Toddler Threw a Fit in Front of President Obama During a Passover Seder TrendingRecord-High Number of French Jews Attend Birthright Israel Trip Record-High Number of French Jews Attend Birthright Israel Trip Trending
 

Despite Calls to Ban Action Bronson's NXNE Set, the Show Will Go On

May 27, 2015 | By Daniel Koren
Despite Calls to Ban Action Bronson's NXNE Set, the Show Will Go On

Change.org launches petition that accuses the rapper of glorifying "gang-raping" and "murdering women"

Read More

Warren Buffet Invests in Israeli Company, Again

May 27, 2015 | By Viva Sarah Press
Warren Buffet Invests in Israeli Company, Again

Ramat Gan-based energy savings solution company, eVolution Networks, completes $22.5 million funding round

Read More

”Remove the Flag or Leave the Apartment," Vienna Landlord tells Jewish Tenant

May 27, 2015 | By B. Shane Morganstein
”Remove the Flag or Leave the Apartment," Vienna Landlord tells Jewish Tenant

Tenant ordered to remove Israeli flag from window, or face eviction

Read More

Muslim Televangelist Warns Followers that Masturbation Will Lead to Hand-Pregnancies

May 27, 2015 | By B. Shane Morganstein
Muslim Televangelist Warns Followers that Masturbation Will Lead to Hand-Pregnancies

A warning from a Muslim televangelist urges viewers not to masturbate, lest their hands become pregnant in the afterlife

Read More

How Should Pro-Israel Voices Tackle the War of Ideas on College Campuses?

May 27, 2015 | By Jeffrey F. Barken, JNS.org
How Should Pro-Israel Voices Tackle the War of Ideas on College Campuses?

While organizations are fighting against the BDS movement on campus, some experts claim that not enough Jewish students are "fighting back"

Read More

WATCH: David Blatt Leaves LeBron James Hanging on a High-Five

May 27, 2015 | By Daniel Koren
WATCH: David Blatt Leaves LeBron James Hanging on a High-Five

The Israeli NBA coach and King James were caught having a pow-wow during the Cavs' romp over the Atlanta Hawks

Read More

New Bill Would Have Israeli Students Learn Both Hebrew and Arabic From the 1st Grade

May 27, 2015 | By B. Shane Morganstein
New Bill Would Have Israeli Students Learn Both Hebrew and Arabic From the 1st Grade

"Knowing the language of the other is the basis for understanding and mutual respect, which are necessary in the current situation in Israel"

Read More

Al Pacino Pulls Out of 'Nazi' Play Written by Hitler Supporter

May 27, 2015 | By Ashley Ramnarain
Al Pacino Pulls Out of 'Nazi' Play Written by Hitler Supporter

The actor had agreed to narrate in a stage adaptation of 'Hunger,' but pulled out upon discovery of author Knut Hamsun's enthusiasm for Nazism

Read More

More Headlines