Shalom Life | October 24, 2014

IOC to Hold Special Moment of Silence at Closing Ceremonies

International Olympic Committee decides to commemorate important events

By: Daniel Horowitz

Published: August 3rd, 2012 in News » World

IOC to Hold Special Moment of Silence at Closing Ceremonies

In what can only be described as an unexpected announcement, Shalom Life has learned that Jacques Rogge, the president of the International Olympic Committee (IOC), has agreed to hold a special commemorative ceremony that will include a moment of silence at the conclusion of the London Olympics, on Sunday, August 12th.

However, what is also unexpected is that the ceremony will not, as hoped by many, commemorate the “Munich 11” - the members of the 1972 Israeli Olympic team murdered during the Munich Olympics - but rather other issues of importance to Rogge himself.

According to preliminary reports acquired by Shalom Life, the ceremony will open with a video montage featuring the best moments of Jennifer Lopez’s time on American Idol, followed by a moment of silence for the singer, who has, much to the dismay of Rogge, announced that she will not be returning to the show next season.

“Unless there’s something that is absolutely urgent, perhaps a White Supremacist Meeting, I make sure that I’m home, in front of my television whenever American Idol is on,” said Rogge in a statement issued last week. “I don’t know what I’m going to do without J. Lo; to me she was the heart and soul of the show. And Stephen Tyler is leaving, too? There’s something terribly wrong with this world if nobody is going to commemorate this tremendous loss, and I feel that the Olympics’ closing ceremonies is the perfect venue in which to hold such a commemoration event.”

The event, which will also feature a song and dance extravaganza with all members of the respective Olympic teams except for the Israeli team and any Jewish competitors, is expected to also see a moment of silence held for the new Sheenless version of Two-and-a-Half Men, another Rogge staple.

“It’s too bad that Charlie had to leave because of the abuse he surely suffered at the hands of the show’s Zionist executive producer,” said Rogge. “I really never got into Ashton Kutcher’s character. I don’t believe that Charlie Sheen’s departure from the show was ever treated properly, and I feel that a ceremony to remember the wonderful and somewhat enigmatic character that was Charlie Harper deserves recognition and a moment of silence at the Olympics, which I feel, is the most appropriate venue for that commemoration.”

Olympic organizers, at the behest of Rogge and the rest of the IOC, are also considering the inclusion of a special dance to be performed by all African nations competing in London, that would serve as a special commemoration for, and salute to, Kofi Annan, the UN-Arab League special envoy for Syria, who announced this week that he is stepping down at the end of the month.

Asked if there will be a moment of silence held for Annan’s departure from the UN, Rogge relied, “Of course, why wouldn’t there be? I think the Olympics is the perfect venue to hold a moment of silence for all important moments that have had an ongoing affect on the people of the world.”

The above story is fiction. Well, except for the part that the IOC will not commemorate the Munich 11. That, sadly, is the truth. Shame on you IOC.

Op-Ed: A New Low for the Associated Press Op-Ed: A New Low for the Associated Press TrendingCanadian Sergeant Kevin Vickers Hailed as National Hero Canadian Sergeant Kevin Vickers Hailed as National Hero TrendingFrench Holocaust Survivor Indicted for Calling anti-Semitic Comedian an anti-Semite French Holocaust Survivor Indicted for Calling anti-Semitic Comedian an anti-Semite Trending
 

Startup Club: Hello Doctor

October 23, 2014 | By Caitlin Marceau
Startup Club: Hello Doctor

The revolutionary new app that allows patients to download their medical records has just received funding from companies that include Facebook and and Google

Read More

Breakthrough Jew - Nic Sheff

October 23, 2014 | By Sara Torvik
Breakthrough Jew - Nic Sheff

Sheff is a best-selling author who uses his experiences as an addict to help others struggling with similar battles.

Read More

Who Was Sarah Michelle Gellar's Favorite On-Screen Kiss With?

October 23, 2014 | By Ashley Ramnarain
Who Was Sarah Michelle Gellar's Favorite On-Screen Kiss With?

Hint: It's not her husband, Freddie Prinze Jr.

Read More

Paula Abdul Wants You To "Check Yourself" During Breast Cancer Awareness Month

October 23, 2014 | By Ashley Ramnarain
Paula Abdul Wants You To "Check Yourself" During Breast Cancer Awareness Month

The former 'American Idol' judge has joined forces with Avon for a new campaign.

Read More

Is This a Halloween Costume or Just James Franco?

October 23, 2014 | By Ashley Ramnarain
Is This a Halloween Costume or Just James Franco?

Seriously. We know Megan Fox is dressed up, but what is Franco doing?

Read More

Smart People Listen to Bob Dylan, Dumb People Listen to Beyonce

October 23, 2014 | By Ashley Baylen
Smart People Listen to Bob Dylan, Dumb People Listen to Beyonce

A new study has compared SAT scores to musical taste to determine what types of music people of varying intellects listen to.

Read More

Air Canada Centre Painted Blue & White As Jewish Toronto Cheers On Maccabi Haifa [PICS]

October 23, 2014 | By Daniel Koren
Air Canada Centre Painted Blue & White As Jewish Toronto Cheers On Maccabi Haifa [PICS]

The Israeli basketball team had an impressive 21-0 run before losing to the Raptors, 92-85

Read More

Op-Ed: A New Low for the Associated Press

October 23, 2014 | By Daniel Koren
Op-Ed: A New Low for the Associated Press

After a Palestinian terrorist rammed his car into a crowded train station, killing a baby, the Associated Press ran this story: "Israeli Police Shoot Man in East Jerusalem"

Read More

More Headlines